When we close the windows and doors of our house and stay inside, we feel very secure, we feel safe, unmolested. But life is not like that. Life is constantly knocking at our door, trying to push open our windows that we may see more; and if out of fear we lock the doors, bolt all the windows, the knocking only grows louder. The closer we cling to security in any form, the more life comes and pushes us. The more we are afraid and enclose ourselves, the greater is our suffering, because life won’t leave us alone. We want to be secure but life says we cannot be; and so our struggle begins.
life won’t leave us alone
Posted by sean on August 14, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/08/14/life-wont-leave-us-alone/
seefeel – ‘through you’
days of nothing to say, nothing to write–only music to transpose feeling from within
Posted by sean on August 10, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/08/10/seefeel-through-you/
friday at black marsh and environs
Black Marsh Wildlands Area, Edgemere, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Little Blue Heron at Black Marsh Wildlands Area, Edgemere, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Eastern Box Turtle at North Point State Park, Edgemere, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Rose Pink (Sabatia angularis) at North Point State Park, Edgemere, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Spicebush Swallowtail at North Point State Park, Edgemere, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Eastern Cottontail at North Point State Park, Edgemere, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Not depicted: (1) the Eastern Ratsnake that beat a hasty retreat from the trail it was attempting to cross when it sensed my approach; (2) the White-tailed Deer fawn that bolted from its hiding spot adjacent to the trail as I came upon it; (3) the 30+ other species of birds I saw and/or heard.
Posted by sean on August 4, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/08/04/friday-at-black-marsh-and-environs/
widow skimmer
A female Widow Skimmer dragonfly at Prettyboy Reservoir, Baltimore County, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Note: While I initially thought this was a female, widow skimmers are sexually dimorphic, meaning that even though the mature males and females look different, the immature males look similar to the females (this is also not uncommon in birds). A good way to separate the sexes is by their terminal appendages, as nicely illustrated in this post by Walter Sanford. The female has two, while the male has three. In order to determine this, one needs a clear close-up view. Unfortunately the resolution of my images is not quite high enough to determine the sex for certain. When I have the image magnified, it looks to me like there is possibly an epiproct present, but because of the angle of the shot I can’t be sure.
UPDATE: Walter Sanford stopped by and identified it as a female (see comments). Thanks, Walter!
Posted by sean on July 28, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/07/28/widow-skimmer/
when spirits decide
the planchette inscribed
ovals on the board
stay or go
we had asked
a reply of stay
led to a why
ovals came back
first spelled out
then drawn
over and over and over.
Posted by sean on July 25, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/07/25/when-spirits-decide/
tree deity
‘Tree Herder’ sculpture from recycled materials by Paul Rodriguez, found trailside @ Lake Roland, Balt County, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
I came upon this woodland spirit during a sweltering late morning hike/bird walk. I’m thankful that it’s there watching over the trees. I was surprised at how many fellow humans were also out sweating in the woods. Trail people are always so friendly, even when it’s in the upper 90s and the humidity feels like we’re all floating in warm bathwater. One runner stopped to talk birds for a few minutes. Others just smiled or said ‘Good morning!’ One of my admittedly unscientific axioms, solely based in anecdotal evidence, is that people are much likelier to make eye contact and greet each other in the woods than they are on the street. Why is this? It is the power of the trees, I suspect. We are all happier in the woods, whether we know it or not. Nature has a calming effect and these days that effect is needed more than ever. As always at this time of year I have been struggling with the heat and not going to the woods has made it worse. But today I took up arms in the face of summer’s brutality and I’m glad that I did. For me there is no substitute for a couple of hours amidst the greens and browns of the forest. I feel it is my true home.
Posted by sean on July 23, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/07/23/tree-deity/
spatial divide
Black sky of crows crowns mornings, bookends to nights of ferocious dream violence
[can an empty space feel occupied—be occupied—with no bodies present]
Jackal fear circles, breathing hidden threat-breath, by unknown summons
[can shadows of bodies, once (they have) / left, still linger, filling space once occupied]
Inside, a wavy line descends, evens out, climbs a steep peak—teeters—declines again
[two containers—one infinite, one finite—hold space—connecting valves open and shut to control in/voluntary flow—allowance for expansion / contraction]
Outside, surrounding space—unbroken—limbs recede at the height of uncertainty
(11-12.14 / 7.17)
Posted by sean on July 23, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/07/23/spatial-divide/
[revised] guidance [from two years ago]
There is nothing where you are going.
What do you mean…nothing.
I mean what I say.
That means nothing.
I understand it to mean something.
I think it’s just something to say…
[shrugs]
But there are things here…around me.
Are you certain.
Yes.
Describe them.
Leaves scattered on the sidewalk. A car’s headlights flicking on in the predawn gloom. The distant whistle of a train.
And do these things have meaning to you.
I-I’m not sure.
Take a closer look.
Well, I notice them.
And what about faces—do you see faces.
They are obscured.
Do you wish to see them with more clarity—to distinguish one from another.
Perhaps.
Now it is you who are evasive.
It is in my nature.
And everything that came before—what happened between when you left and when you returned—is it now gone.
Yes, for the most part. I see only glimpses but I cannot bring it all into focus.
In those glimpses you see more than in what surrounds you now. The latter is of little consequence.
How do you know.
It does not matter. What matters is in between.
In between what.
The words.
Posted by sean on July 20, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/07/20/revised-guidance-from-two-years-ago/
prettyboy reservoir
Prettyboy Reservoir, Baltimore County, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Clouds near Prettyboy Reservoir, Baltimore County, Maryland, USA. © 2017 S. D. Stewart
Posted by sean on July 16, 2017
https://sd-stewart.com/2017/07/16/prettyboy-reservoir/
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