“Dreams: the place most of us get what we need”—Amy Hempel
All posts in category dreams
in the wilderness
Posted by sean on September 16, 2010
https://sd-stewart.com/2010/09/16/in-the-wilderness/
wind watch
We are under a Wind Watch. So this morning I watched the wind. It was snowing and the world outside looked like a snow globe shaken by a vicious god. The relentless wind blew the flakes in every direction, hardly ever allowing them to touch the ground. The vent on the skylight rattled, and I found a feather that had blown in through it and landed on the bathroom floor.
I listened to Fahey’s “America” and watched the frenetic flakes dance outside the window to the rich, odd twanging of steel strings. The coffee went down smooth, as did Heinrich’s ruminations on a winter spent in Maine’s woods. There was a certain synchronicity to my morning that doesn’t often visit.
I fed the birds and repotted a few plants. I recorded my dreams of the night before. Everything seems to be in order, for the moment.
Posted by sean on February 26, 2010
https://sd-stewart.com/2010/02/26/wind-watch/
sparrow dreams
Yesterday I decided to go birding this morning at Irvine Nature Center, because there had been reports of Red-headed Woodpeckers seen and heard there recently. I’ve only seen one once before, and it was only a brief glimpse. Then last night I dreamt that I saw a Fox Sparrow while out birding. The Fox Sparrow is my favorite of the “winter” sparrows in this area, and I hadn’t yet seen one this year. So today I was hoping that even if I didn’t see a Red-headed Woodpecker, I would at least get a Fox Sparrow as a consolation prize. Well, I did! I found one scratching around up along a ridge. I also kept hearing a Brown Creeper (another favorite) calling shortly afterward, but never could locate it. There were plenty of other woodpeckers about, and many Dark-eyed Juncos. I ran into some other birders who were also out looking for the Red-headed Woodpeckers. We exchanged birding pleasantries, and then I headed back to the parking lot, not completely satisfied, but satisfied enough.
Posted by sean on November 28, 2009
https://sd-stewart.com/2009/11/28/sparrow-dreams/
day and night
Blank mind in daytime hours. Night mind at rest stuffed with latent flotsam. To reconcile impossible. In sleep, what’s behind the wall stirs. To empty into linear thought, an uncertain task. In waking, the trivial seeds itself deep in dry barren soil. Buried even deeper dwells the core. I seek only to scrape down and gaze upon it for a moment.
Posted by sean on February 11, 2009
https://sd-stewart.com/2009/02/11/day-and-night/
another apocalyptic dream
This time it was a massive flood. I was not among people I knew. Everyone was really poor. I seemed to have some type of mental deficiency. I almost drowned several times. There seemed to be no way out. Every time I thought I’d gotten to safe ground, another wave of water came crashing toward me. Eventually I found myself up above it all with some others. A woman came and told us that there were Army trucks nearby to take us to safety. But that they were charging each person $10. The people I was with responded with snarky remarks like, “Well, isn’t that typical.”
Another dream: I was working at my old library. The director told me and a coworker we had to go down to these branches in the southern part of the county (my old library didn’t have branches), and perform a variety of tasks, including giving people their evaluations and teaching classes on some computer program that I’ve never even heard of. My coworker was given other tasks to do at other branches. I was like, how are we going to get all this done when I don’t even have a car? And how can I give someone an evaluation when I don’t even know them or work with them? And how can I teach a computer class on a program I’ve never even heard of?
Posted by sean on October 15, 2008
https://sd-stewart.com/2008/10/15/another-apocalyptic-dream/
time is a zip tie pulling tight around my summer
Yes, so it is nearing mid-July and I have not done much with my summer beyond log a lot of miles on the bike. People keep asking me if I have any vacation plans. Believe me, I wish I did. I desperately need to lie on a deserted beach for about two weeks. But the chances of that happening are slim in these uncertain times.
My dead cat keeps visiting me in my dreams. They are not bad dreams. I wake up feeling like I was with him. In the dreams, I stroke his soft fur and he responds to my touch, curling his paws around my arm the way he always used to do. I feel like he is trying to tell me that he is still around and that he is happy. I miss him so much. Sometimes when I come home I just want him to be there, yearning to be held. I love his sister, and I am grateful that she is still with me. But they were always like night and day. And she is not meant to be a substitute for him.
Out there is not the answer. It’s in here and we’re breathing it, we’re speaking it, in short quiet moments of insignificance. Always when least expected, and often when most needed.
Posted by sean on July 11, 2008
https://sd-stewart.com/2008/07/11/time-is-a-zip-tie-pulling-tight-around-my-summer/
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